To start the week I got a ridiculous craving for some story based rhythm games. My personal favorite game of that type is Parappa. In an attempt to satiate that craving I picked up the PSP re-release of the PlayStation classic. It didn't exactly turn out the way I expected.
Since Parappa didn't end up being what I wanted I needed another game. I ended up getting the PSP re-release of the PS2 game Gitaroo Man. Somehow I never ended up buying the PS2 version. It's a shame, because I thought the game was freaking awesome, but the PS2 version is super expensive now. It might be a bit weird, but it was just what I needed.
As if Gitaroo Man wasn't ridiculous enough I picked up the super obscure PS2 game Chulip. If you want to get a little crazy there should be a heart between the u and the l, but I'm not that intense so there will be no hearts here. I was trying to get rid of my unneeded bookmarks, when I came across the Amazon product page for the game. I bookmarked it my freshman year of college. After looking up a few videos I decided to take the plunge down into weird town and ordered it online. I don't want to talk it up, but I'm confident in saying it's the weirdest game I've ever played.
I don't know how this week ended up getting so weird, but it really did. So get ready for an all weird edition of Game Time.
Parappa The Rapper (PSP)
I love Parappa. What's more lovable than a rapping dog who's in love with a sunflower? The answer is nothing.
All joking aside, I really like Parappa. It's super weird, but more than that it's creative. Like most rhythm games it would be absolutely nothing without good music. Each rap is about a different situation that Parappa needs to overcome and they're all fairly entertaining. In fact, I'm listening to Prince Fleaswallow's Rap now, and I recommend you do the same.
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| For Some reason Parappa is attracted to a sunflower. |
The gameplay of Parappa is very similar to Simon Says. The Master will do their verse first to demonstrate and as Parappa you must copy the button presses with the correct rhythm. It's exceedingly simple, so it may not be engaging for some people. This may be the reason why games of this type don't get released very often anymore. I think the reason Parappa got away with it was because of its sense of style. All of the character's are made to look like paper. When you pair that with the fact that it's based around animals rapping it's just an interesting experience.
Despite my love for Parappa I don't own a copy of the PS1 game. I did play it when I was younger though. I do however have Parappa 2, and the series spin-off Um Jammer Lammy. Since the PS1 version of Parappa is so expensive I thought I'd try to round out my collection with the PSP version. Much to my dismay I didn't have as much fun as I wanted to.
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| The PSP version of Parappa certainly doesn't have the funky flow. |
The sense of style and the awesome music remained, but the gameplay just wasn't working for me at all. I passed the first level with flying colors, but the further into the game I got the worse I was. When I hit the 4th stage I hit a brick wall and couldn't pass it for hours. I thought that I was hitting every button at the exact time I was supposed to. The timing in Parappa is odd, but I could hear Parappa saying what he should have, when he needed to. I got so mad I thought about smashing my PSP, but instead I went to the internet to see what I was doing wrong.
It turns out that the PSP version of Parappa isn't a good port. In fact, it's downright bad. I found numerous forum topics and even a news story on Destructoid about how the timing wasn't right in most of the songs. I also found people saying that the delay was due to the PSP having low battery. Much to my amazement that was actually the problem. When I plugged in my PSP the game worked totally fine. I wasn't doing anything different, but I was passing all of the songs. This is simply inexcusable for a handheld game. You should definitely be able to play the game without having the battery charged fully.
Gitaroo Man Lives!
After my poor experience with the PSP version of Parappa I didn't have high hopes for the PSP version of Gitaroo Man, but I was pleasantly surprised.
I had never played Gitaroo man before this and now I'm upset that I didn't. As you'd imagine it's a rhythm game based around the guitar. It wouldn't be a proper rhythm game unless its story was utterly ridiculous bordering on nonsensical though. Gitaroo man has that going for it too.
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| This is Gitaroo Man. The game is just as ridiculous as he looks! |
The story follows U-1 (A play on U-2) and he's basically a loser. He's trying to impress a girl, but he just can't seem to do it. While he's sulking in his room a weird little demon attacks him and his dog Puma gives him a guitar. The guitar is known as a Gitaroo and U-1 can wield it to become the mighty Gitaroo Man. When in his super form he can shred jammin' hot riffs in order to take down his enemies.
The story ends up taking him to planet Gitaroo, which is under the control of the evil Zowie ( A play on David Bowie). Since he's in possession of the last Gitaroo, U-1 must rise to the occasion and save the planet. In doing so he gains the courage to get with the girl he wanted. Typing the plot out like I just did makes it sound a lot less crazy than it actually is. You really have to play it, or see it to understand what I'm talking about.
The gameplay of Gitaroo Man isn't like your average rhythm game. While you still need to push the buttons at the right time there's a bit more to it than that. Each song in Gitaroo Man is a battle. You'll start by charging up your health with the sweet sound of your guitar. A blue line will move towards the middle of the screen. Your job is to follow that line with the analog stick in order to activate it. Red circles will appear along the line and when they reach the middle you'll need to push circle in order to have U-1 play a note. If the circle extends you'll have to hold circle for that amount of time. This same method is used to do damage to your opponent.
Things become more like a normal rhythm game when you're defending against enemy attacks. Buttons will fly towards the middle of the screen and if you time the presses right U-1 won't take any damage. The whole battle concept is interesting and it's executed fairly well. It makes you feel like you're doing more than just making the music keep going.
Chulip
As I wrote up the previous two sections I realized that they don't sound super weird. While they are actually weird, you have to see them to understand. That's how I know Chulip is on a whole new level of craziness, because it still sounds weird even when it's typed out. It's a game based completely around kissing.
Yeah, that's right. It's a game about kissing. There is no combat, only exploration and kissing. You take the role of a boy who has just moved to a new town. He's recently had a dream about kissing his dream girl and it turns out she lives in town! Sadly she doesn't want to kiss him, because he's poor and has a bad reputation. Don't worry, it's just as shallow and ridiculous as it sounds.
In order to kiss the dream girl under the tree of love (It's a normal tree with the face of an old man peeking out) the hero must first kiss other denizens of Long Life Town in order to get his reputation up. In order to keep the premise as weird and creepy as possible you have to name both the boy and the dream girl. If there's anyone you want to kiss really bad Chulip offers you the chance to creepily base your entire experience around them.
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| You're going to be kissing everyone in town with those sweet sweet lips. |
Again. there is no combat in this game, only exploration, item collection, train riding, saving on the toilet, sleeping on the floor, and kissing. At the beginning of the game the hero has a weak heart. When people say mean things to him, you pick up poop out of a trash can, get rejected when trying to kiss someone, or get hit by something your heart will be broken. It starts at 5/5, but the more people you kiss the more you'll be able to take. Right now I'm up to 60/60 and I can take quite a bit of rejection and poop.
So how do you kiss people? The easiest people to kiss are the citizens who live underground. At certain times or under certain conditions they'll dig up out of the ground. Fumes will circle their head and if you move too fast they'll beat the hell out of you and your heart will break. The key is to sneak up on them and wait until they're no longer angry. Eventually music notes will appear around their head and that means it's time to plant one on em'. Each time you successfully kiss someone you'll be rewarded with an exquisite scene. You and the character you kissed will spin around in space while the word CLEAR appears in all rainbow as fireworks go off. Oh yeah, also weirdly sensual saxophone music plays.
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| Why yes, that is a man in a trash can he's kissing. |
The other option is to kiss normal non-angry citizens. However, they're a lot tougher to handle. Instead of waiting for them to calm down you're going to have to do a quest for them. Most of them are super obscure and they're borderline impossible to figure out. The developers knew this, because the instruction manual doubles as a strategy guide, which is bananas. It's not a lame list of hints either. It literally tells you how to kiss everyone and complete everything. I wanted to try and play without using it, but after a certain point it was impossible. The game just doesn't give you enough information. I'm pretty close to the end and I've had to use the manual quite a bit.
For some reason I like this game in an un-ironic way. There's something relaxing about it. All you do is try to figure out how to kiss people. A lot of the game involves waiting and traveling. There are four areas and none of them are super large, but they're all interesting enough to explore. Since the game is so insane I still don't have a full grasp on it yet. If you want to see some of it for yourself I suggest looking up a lets play of it on Youtube. There are a few of them and they're quite funny.
SO WEIRD
I used to think Parappa was weird, but it pales in comparison to Chulip. I just don't understand how such a thing was created and I especially don't understand how or why it was every translated into English. I can almost guarantee it didn't sell well. At least they can say that the idea was original?
I still don't quite understand how I got sucked into this past week of weird gaming, but I kind of liked it. I can only hope that the trend continues on into the coming weeks.
This has been another edition of Game Time. Have a nice week and maybe try to kiss everyone in your town.
-Manny
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